Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Ask, Live Bigger. Power of Lofty Questions
Unlock a life of endless possibilities by transforming the way you think with the power of lofty questions.
In this episode, we explore how asking expansive, open-ended questions will shift your perspective, helping you to envision extraordinary outcomes and align your actions with a desired outcome. You'll discover how to disrupt self-imposed limitations and rewire your brain to create belief, change, and confidence.
We'll explore the remarkable impact of questioning in areas like faith, spirituality, personal growth, and confidence. By asking bold, audacious questions like "How is it that things are already getting better?" or "Why am I such a trusted leader?", you can transition from skepticism to acceptance and from a state of wanting to one of having.
Let these questions be the catalysts for creating a life centered around your limitless potential.
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Welcome to Islamic Life Coach School Podcast. Apply tools that you learn in this podcast and your life will be unrecognizably successful. Now your host, dr Kamal Atar. Hello, hello, hello everyone. Peace and blessings be upon all of you.
Speaker 1:Today we're going to be talking about asking big questions, lofty questions, just so you can live a bigger life. These questions are so big, they're open-ended, they're expansive, they stretch your mind to think beyond your current reality. They're the kind of questions that don't just focus on solving immediate problems, but they encourage you to dream bigger, aim higher and consider the most extraordinary outcomes possible in your life. These are the questions that push the boundaries of your self-concept, inviting you to imagine possibilities that are currently looking like they're out of your reach, but yet somehow they will stir something deep inside of you. They will start to rewire your brain, rewire your body, memory. In the beginning, it might feel like that they're forcing you to jump to unrealistic conclusions, but just with sparking a little bit of a shift, a little bit of a perspective, just by allowing yourself to ask these questions, you're opening up to what is the possibility that this question can be answered. So why should you be asking lofty questions? That's because they create a space for growth and possibility. When you ask yourself something like what if I could inspire thousands of people just by living authentically this is a question that I ask myself a lot. Or if you ask a question like why am I so confident that others are naturally drawn to my energy, it sounds like you're entertaining wild fantasies, but you're entertaining the opposite of these wild fantasies all the time. When you're asking questions like why am I so inconfident? Why do I always repel people? Why don't I have charisma? You are asking lofty questions. You're just asking them in the wrong direction.
Speaker 1:In this podcast, I'm asking you to ask big. Live bigger by asking the right type of lofty questions, because when you do that, your brain's going to start to engage in the answers differently. It's going to start aligning with the bigger vision. Your mind loves to find answers and when you keep asking it a question that you don't have an immediate answer to, it starts to live in the realm of possibilities. This is you giving your brain a new GPS destination and letting it find the route, and a lot of that path finding happens subconsciously. If the journey feels long right now, let it.
Speaker 1:Your job is to live in the question, these types of lofty questions also disrupt the pattern of doubt and self-limitation that you've been carrying for a long time. If you've spent years asking, why do I always fail? Why can't I ever get ahead? These are the questions that are shaping your reality subconsciously. You've likely built an entire identity by now just by the answers of these questions. But when you start to ask yourself, what if success is starting to come naturally to me, you're shaking the foundations of that limiting belief and the identity you've built on it. You're giving yourself permission to explore a new possibility and breaking out of the mental loop that has kept you stuck. It is now suddenly being given a key to a door you didn't even know existed.
Speaker 1:And the beauty of lofty questions is that they aren't about immediate answers. You don't need to know right away how you're going to achieve those big dreams or why you're even worthy of them. You just need to start asking. The emphasis is on the curiosity. The emphasis is on the curiosity. The emphasis is on the question. The questions alone are powerful enough to plant seeds of possibility in your mind. This is when your brain starts to notice opportunity that you would otherwise overlook, and then, eventually, your actions begin to align with this new story that you've started telling yourself. Think of lofty questions like the opening credits to the movie of your life. They set the stage for something greater, something incredible that's yet to come, something that's been waiting for you to notice it.
Speaker 1:So this podcast is my invite for you to not be afraid to ask yourself biggest, boldest, the most audacious questions. Ask questions like what if my potential is far greater than what I've been giving myself credit for? What if I'm more capable, more impactful, more resilient than I've ever allowed myself to believe? By asking these questions, you're inviting a new reality in your life, one where you're not focusing as much on the past failures or the current circumstances, but you're focusing on the limitless potential that you hold. Let yourself wonder, let yourself imagine and just watch how the pieces start to come together. As I've discussed in the previous podcast, there's a state of wanting, where you are in a state of gap, a void of not having something, and then there's a state of having what you dream of. Lofty questions start to put you in a state of having. So now I'm going to give you a bunch of examples of what kind of lofty questions you could be asking. They don't always have to be about wealth and income although they can be but start asking lofty questions in all areas of your life just to get your brain into this habit.
Speaker 1:Ask these questions about faith and spirituality. Things like why do I embody such a deep sense of inner peace in my prayers? Why are others drawn to my unwavering faith in Allah? How is it that I'm always able to get up after a short period of having low faith? How is it that I'm always able to get up after a short period of having low faith? How is my connection to Allah so strong that it brings clarity and direction in all aspects of my life? Why do I naturally inspire others to seek a closer relationship with Allah in their religion? How is it that I'm able to inspire myself and others through my own examples of devotion and trust in Allah's plan?
Speaker 1:And then more questions about personal growth and confidence. Why am I so confident in my own skin that I effortlessly attain what I want? How is it that I inspire other women to embrace their authentic selves? How is it that I'm able to be so confident in my personal growth and so aligned with my highest self that it allows me to achieve success? Why do I have such unshakable confidence in myself, unshakable belief in my self-worth? How is it that I no longer seek validation from others? How is it that I firmly believe my own value that comes from within?
Speaker 1:Questions about family and parenting. How am I able to create such a nurturing and loving environment at my home? How is it that I'm able to meet my family's emotional needs without a strain? How is it that I'm able to meet my own spiritual and emotional needs and support myself every day? What is it about my parenting style that allows my children to grow into confident human beings? How is it that I'm able to raise compassionate and faith-centered individuals? How have I been able to maintain such a beautiful balance between discipline and love that I carry for my children? How is it that I'm able to respect and guide people in my life with care?
Speaker 1:Questions about your marriage. Why does my marriage radiate this mutual admiration and love? How am I creating such a strong foundation for both of us to grow? How is this partnership so aligned with my values that it continually supports me? How is it that we are able to uplift each other so much? Why does my relationship with my spouse inspire others to seek exactly this kind of love. Why is my trust so much? Why does my relationship with my spouse inspire others to seek exactly this kind of love? Why is my trust so deep? Why is my companionship so rejuvenating? How is it that we're built to be together?
Speaker 1:Other questions with health and well-being. Why do I take such excellent care of my physical and mental health? How is it that I'm able to radiate vitality and positivity? How am I seamlessly integrating wellness practices into my life, no matter how busy I am? How am I enhancing my energy while working? How is it that I'm able to carry the right amount of focus that I need for my work? How am I emphasizing my happiness? What is it about me that keeps me so in tune with my body that I instinctively know how to nourish it, how to take care of it, how to show up for myself in the best way possible?
Speaker 1:Questions about your leadership within your community. Questions about your leadership Ask questions like why am I such a natural leader? Why is it that my community inclined to follow me? How are my acts of service able to make such a lasting impact on other people? Why is it that I'm able to create such a positive change wherever I go? How am I able to guide other people into improving their lives?
Speaker 1:Questions about career and success Ask questions like why am I so excellent at my work that success flows to me effortlessly and naturally? How have I built this exact career that is perfectly aligned with my values? How is it that my career and lifestyle choices are completely in sync and in balance? How is it that my exact career choice is able to provide me a perfect work-life balance? What is it about my professional expertise that makes me such a sought-after authority in my field? What is it about my skills and my personality that has me so respected and admired by my colleagues and my employees? Even my clients Ask lofty questions about your self-care and your balanced life.
Speaker 1:Why do I prioritize my self-care so much? How am I able to maintain it so well? How is it that I can balance personal, professional and my spiritual life? How is it that I'm allowing myself to show up fully for people that I care about? What makes me so skilled at setting boundaries, that I protect my peace without sacrificing my relationships? This is a question that I ask myself a lot and come up with incredible answers, and these answers come over time in like a piecemeal fashion. Going back to more spirituality, ask questions like Alhamdulillah, how am I able to create such a beautiful legacy of Islamic values that even my children follow? Everyone around me carries that energy. What makes my journey towards Jannah so easy, so impactful, what makes it so easy for me to leave a legacy behind of goodness, knowledge and service to my amma? So I've given you a lot of questions about pretty much all areas of your life and we've done almost a 360, but it kind of gives you an idea of, if there's anything remaining, what you need to be looking for in asking the questions and how you might want to word it. But now I want to talk about why these questions might feel unbelievable to you.
Speaker 1:When you hear a question like why am I so trusted as a leader in my community, or why do my children naturally seek my guidance, your immediate thought might have been but that's not me. It doesn't feel that way. That's not true, and that's perfectly normal, because your brain is used to playing a different story on repeat, one that's based on your current self image, which is colored by doubt and insecurity and not being able to see what you don't see yet. So, from a neuroscience perspective, every time you entertain a thought, you're just strengthening a certain neural pathway in your brain. If you have spent years thinking I'm not good enough, or my children don't follow me, or I'm not a good leader, these are the thoughts that are wired in your brain like a well-traveled path.
Speaker 1:When you hear a positive question that doesn't align with your current self-image, your brain is bound to reject it because it's unfamiliar. That does not mean something's gone wrong. It means that everything's going exactly how it's supposed to. So don't let the unfamiliarity shake you up. I know it's hard when you're standing in the middle of uncertainty and it feels like the best case scenario is something that only happens for other people and not you. It's okay if you don't believe the most positive outcome right now. It's okay if you don't yet see how things are going to turn out in the manner how you're asking these questions.
Speaker 1:I am not asking you to jump into believing in all sunshine and roses. I'm just asking you to ask the question. Just stay in the world of questions. What if it could be better? What if things are lining up exactly the way you envision them? If you are already asking questions which you are you've probably been asking yourself why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this mess? And somewhere deep down, you've accepted the negative answers to these questions. You're just believing those answers like they're the final truth, as if somehow you're doomed to whatever is happening right now. But consider this how did you get to that point? How did those answers become the ultimate truth? That's because you've been asking those questions over and over for way too long. You've been asking the wrong questions multiple times a day. When you keep asking, why is my luck so bad or how did everything get so messed up, your brain will start serving you up all of the answers to these questions in a silver platter and it will look like this is the ultimate truth.
Speaker 1:Consider asking these questions like a Google search. You type in something negative and it's going to bring back a whole list of reasons to prove your exact point. But what if you switched it up? What if you typed in a different question with a different tone, with a different narrative, one that leaves room for hope or just even curiosity? If you type that level of a question in a Google search, if you start typing your lofty questions, your brain would start finding evidence for that. You do not need to believe the best case scenario right now. You just need to give it a chance to exist in your mind.
Speaker 1:It is not about faking positivity or forcing yourself to believe something that feels out of reach. It's just about making a shift of your perspective just enough to let in a new possibility. Maybe you don't yet believe that you can get the dream job, or you can do your current job without stress, or that you can have a relationship that's well-heeled. You don't yet believe that your financial situation will turn around. That's perfectly fine. But what if you asked about all of these situations? What if things could get better? What if you allowed yourself to sit with the positive question instead of immediately shutting it down, living in the possibility of what if? That's the state of having.
Speaker 1:So next time you catch yourself in that negativity loop, asking questions that reinforce your fears and doubts. Just pause, ask yourself something different. What if things could be better than this? What if I'm not as stuck as I think I am? And you don't have to have all the answers, but trust me, the simple act of asking the right question will start delivering you the answers. When you ask lofty questions, you're not just practicing fleeting positivity. You're practicing a state of being, a state of having. You are capable of embodying this deep sense of confidence, this faith, personal growth. If you've practiced years believing a narrative that does not serve you, please allow yourself to practice something that might end up serving you at the end. Allow your brain to be presented with lofty questions, even if these questions are about any trivial everyday life happenings, things that otherwise seem mundane.
Speaker 1:How is it that my toddlers always go to sleep on time and stay asleep? How is it that I get the right amount of sleep in my day? How is it that my toddlers always go to sleep on time and stay asleep? How is it that I get the right amount of sleep in my day? How is it that the only right kind of prospects are attracted to me for marriage? How is it that my children are always finishing the meal that I put in front of them without a fuss? How do I have so much energy throughout the day to perform at the highest at my work and feel relaxed? How is it that I naturally make time for my self-care without sacrificing time with my family? What is it about me that makes me such an organized stay-at-home mom? What is it about me that makes me walk in a boardroom with such confidence? Why does everything fall into place when I plan my meals for the week? How is it that I'm able to attract such limitless possibilities? How am I such a good swimmer? How am I able to get the right amount of peace and relaxation with my walks? If you ask a lofty question, even about the most trivial events in your life, the brain will start serving up answers for you. Lofty questions just means asking about things that you don't quite believe yet they could be, about anything in your life.
Speaker 1:Okay, so if you've been listening to me all this time, you might notice that I love equipping you with evidence. I love giving you scientific proof and endless reasons to jump headfirst into the week's practice. Endless reasons to jump headfirst into the week's practice. I want you to practice whatever has inspired you in this podcast. Usually I'm here with the studies, the theories and the facts to fuel your excitement and your curiosity, and all of that serves me and my listeners very well. But today I'm doing something completely different. Today, I'm not giving you any of the facts of the how-to. I'm not giving you any scientific studies. I'm not giving you any of the facts, of the how-to. I'm not giving you any scientific studies. I'm not giving you any proof.
Speaker 1:I know your mind's going to be racing, desperate to know the how. How is this going to work? How is it going to change anything? How am I going to engage myself in this level of questioning? But the truth is this isn't the moment to dive into the how. Living in the question is exactly the practice of how.
Speaker 1:So take this week's practice and take every moment to immerse yourself in the question. Just sit with it. Let it linger, let it open up space within you Because, just like you've spent hours, days, even years asking the wrong questions, this is your invite to start asking the right questions, asking something new, not because you have every answer, but because the question itself is important. Question holds the power. This week, let yourself explore without a roadmap. Trust that by simply asking, you're already creating room for things to shift in your life, things to appear in a way in your life that didn't seem possible before. Just hold the question in your center vision and let it be your guide. Your only job is to feel that's it. Feel curious, feel the truth behind the question. Just feel the emotions that arise when you ask yourself these questions.
Speaker 1:I'm not asking you to figure out how everything will happen. I'm not teaching you how it will happen. I'm not asking you to immediately believe in the perfect outcome. All I'm asking is for you to give yourself permission to sit with whatever feeling comes up in the response. That's the heart of this practice, the golden thread that ties everything together, and it might seem simple and boring, but there's immense power in it. There's incredible power in allowing yourself to connect with the emotions that these questions spark in you. And if you're not used to feeling your emotions, then the feelings that come up are going to be fleeting, going to be very momentary. You might just feel only a quick rush of hope or excitement, or even disbelief, before your mind rushes into doubt or skepticism Again completely normal.
Speaker 1:The key here is to let yourself feel whatever arises, without judgment, no matter how brief or fragile those emotions and those moments seem. We're not trying to make the feeling of these questions last forever. We're just trying to notice them within us. We're just trying to teach our brain that these feelings actually do exist and that, with time, we're able to honor them for a longer and longer period of time and that we can trust ourselves to live in these feelings.
Speaker 1:What will happen as a natural consequence of allowing yourself to ask these questions and allowing yourself to feel that whatever feelings come up, is that they'll grow stronger and stay with you longer, and every small moment of belief, no matter how short-lived it seemed in the beginning, is going to become a step towards shifting your inner reality and creating a bigger and bigger change. These questions will feel lofty. That's the point. They're speaking to a reality that you don't quite believe yet. But as long as you continue this practice, you'll start to notice a shift. What once felt out of reach will begin to feel slightly possible, then maybe even probable, and then eventually it will become an undeniable truth. The questions themselves will evolve from a far-fetched dream into something that your heart now fully embraces. So don't worry about figuring everything out now. Don't worry about how is this possible, how you're going to make it real. Just focus on the feeling that these questions provoke within you and trust it. In time, those feelings will anchor you into a new reality.
Speaker 1:Inshallah, with that I pray to Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala. O Allah, guide my heart to ask the right questions. Open the doors to the wisdom and mercy that you've placed within me. Help me trust in your plan without needing to see the full path ahead. Let my mind and my life be at peace with the unknown and fill my heart with faith that you are leading me to the best outcome possible. Ameen Ya Rabbul Alameen, please keep me in your du'as. I will talk to you guys next time.