Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Power of Pronoia
Power of "pronoia"—the belief that the universe is always working in your favor—In this episode we explore how you go beyond just reframing failures as stepping stones, and to go towards best positive thinking.
But that’s not all. We also explore pronoia through the rich, profound lens of Islamic teachings and how seeing every challenge as part of Allah’s merciful plan can turn adversity into opportunity. We discuss the delicate balance between mindful positivity and pathological optimism. Engaging in positivity with awareness and control.
Learn practical strategies to harness positive inertia and cultivate a resilient mindset that translates to an upward trajectory
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If this podcast has benefited you, imagine the value of a one-on-one meeting with me! Click below to schedule your FREE consultation. Discover solutions with no obligation.
https://www.islamiclifecoachschool.com/appointments
Welcome to Islamic Life Coach School Podcast. Apply tools that you learn in this podcast and your life will be unrecognizably successful. Now your host, dr Kamal Atar. Hello, hello, hello everyone. Peace and blessings be upon all of you. I realized that in my last few podcasts I've been giving references of physics and in that spirit I'm going to continue that trend today.
Speaker 1:Newton's first law of motion states that an object at rest will stay at rest and an object in motion will stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force. It is also defined that inertia is the resistance of an object to changes in its state, meaning if it's moving it will resist stopping and if it's stopped it will resist moving. So for it to change the state, you would have to initially apply an external force that is greater than the force you need to keep the motion intact. Simple enough the initial force requirement to overcome this resistance and start moving an object from its rest state is a greater force than is required. What is needed to keep it moving, compared to when it has already started to move? I'm just giving you the same concept in a couple of words, because it's going to become very clear how it applies to our well-being and our psychology. So how does this actually apply to you If you have a general sense of unease or sadness or demotivation? That is your subconscious mind's movement. It's used to thinking of things in a certain way and it will keep doing so until acted upon by an external force. And a human being's natural state is that of the nafs a gravitational pull to the low state, unless acted upon by a different force that wants to take us higher, pull us upwards. In this default state, it is easy to forget the mercy of Allah, easy to overlook things that we can be grateful for, unless a higher, greater force is acted upon us and that powerful force is the remembrance of Allah act of our conscious mind.
Speaker 1:And then, how does anyone in the world achieve success? They learn from their failures. They learn to see the glass half full. They embody that success is built on a pile of failures, even when the initial shock of failure has them crushed. If you want to be successful, the way to move forward is to see some good in it, asking yourself how is this outcome in my favor? Every successful person, if they want to be successful, they work on processing the shock of disappointment and they move forward with some positivity or just, at the very least, some curiosity.
Speaker 1:And this state of positivity requires the inertia that we were talking about. It requires force, it requires moving into, because the state you're built to carry by default is asking questions like what is wrong with me? Why can't I get this right? Why is this taking me so long to figure out? Nobody understands me. I'm all alone.
Speaker 1:The language of default, of self-criticism, shame or blame requires no initial higher force, because that is the state of the subconscious mind. That is what it's built to maintain. So our right out of the box tendency is that of the downward pull. This is our initial movement, and for you to be successful in this world or the next, you have to have a force acting upon you that will cancel this downward force out and it will pull you up in the opposite direction. This force comes from your mind and this initial force needs to be much more powerful. That is needed to maintain the upward trajectory. This is what I was referencing in the Newton's first law of physics.
Speaker 1:The amount of constructive thinking that you'll have to do to pull yourself up and heal yourself initially will be a lot more than what you will need to maintain that state of peace and joy. It will undoubtedly require an extreme form of positive thinking until your mind has gathered the inertia to work in your favor and then it continues to build you up with little to no maintenance. At that point it wouldn't require as much energy and effort. For that, I'm inviting you to consider that it will be helpful for you to create an extreme form of positive thinking in a face of an undesired outcome, to cancel the downward inertia. And also don't get me wrong extreme state of anything is never good. Islam promotes moderation. So, while the extreme form of any mindset or emotion is not healthy, extreme sadness is depression, extreme happiness is mania, extreme fantasy is paranoia or hallucinations.
Speaker 1:I'm not asking for you to be in those states, but I am asking to create an extreme state of positivity, at least initially, because of all positive outcomes that happen out of failure come out of some positive thinking, no matter how small the initial positive thinking is. You can think of anyone in the world Michael Jordan, thomas Edison, steve Jobs. How many failures did they have to face to get to where they got? And if these examples don't click with you, just reflect back on your own life. How have you restructured adversity in your favor. How has your past made you the person you are today? And the answer will be you did it because of some form of constructive thinking. When life gave you lemons, you made lemonade. What I have told you so far might not be news, but trust me, the next bit that I'm building on is going to change your life.
Speaker 1:For this concept to come together so far you'll have to consider you need positive thinking to create success. Your default is a downward pull that keeps you from creating this success. You need forceful inertia that will help you change your direction from downward thinking to upward thinking. These are the three components that we've covered so far. What I'm going to emphasize today is that initial state of inertia, the higher force, this form of positive thinking, is called pronoia, not paranoia, but pronoia. This initially required higher than usual force is a state of pranoya. Pranoya is a belief that the universe is only working in your favor. It is a state of optimistic expectations, a belief system that good things are constantly unfolding and that the universe only has a benevolent plan for you. Now, this is the definition that I recently heard, because this is a recently constructed concept, but then I decided to create this podcast for Muslim women. So, as Muslim women, I'm inviting you to only believe that Allah SWT has a benevolent plan for you. Only good outcomes are coming for you. Each situation only in my favor.
Speaker 1:As it relates to paranoia, in that state it's much easier to slip into negative thinking. If you have heavy rain on the day of your best friend's baby shower that you were really excited to arrange, or construction during a family road trip that caused delays, it is easy to think this is the worst thing that can ever happen and feel bad about yourself and the situation. You will easily slip into negative thinking without effort, when you would actually need to apply inertia and energy to redirect your mind to think how is this the best thing that could have happened to you? How is this the best thing that could have happened to you? Your mind has a default, ingrained energy to run endless worst-case scenarios, but you have to move towards running endless positive scenarios. If rain caused flash floods on the day of your party, it could mean that you have something more amazing waiting for you to happen, that you could put together a better baby shower or fewer friends showed up and you got to enjoy a more intimate gathering.
Speaker 1:You have to move into paranoia. You have to create it with energy. Or how has Allah made the construction that added time to your road trip the best possible scenario for you? Or if your kid vomited in the plane, it is easy to slip into embarrassment or extreme worry about your child's illness. How is this Allah's best plan for you, a way of making the best possible event happen for you? If you don't move into positivity, you are bound to slip into negativity. That is the default in each and every situation. That will happen unless you practice moving up into positivity. On the same token, we have to remind ourselves of Allah's endless and bountiful mercy.
Speaker 1:There is an entire chapter in the Quran called Ar-Rahman. The most merciful Mercy itself is mentioned about 348 times in the Quran. Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him was an embodiment of mercy. In Quran, surah 21, ayah 107, it says we have not sent you except as mercy to the world. Surah Az-Zumar, 39ah 53, is called the ayah of mercy. Say O my worshippers who have transgressed against himself never lose hope in the mercy of Allah. How has every difficult situation in your life been the most merciful thing that could ever happen to you? How has your financial situation, your diagnosis, your job opportunities have been the most merciful thing that could ever happen to you.
Speaker 1:Invite pro-noia in your life by looking at it through the lens of Allah's infinite mercy and love. If you can't find an Islamic school for your children and you've been searching for a perfect Islamic environment for them, but every option you consider falls short of your expectations your pro-noid perspective will dictate that Allah has a special plan for your children's education. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to create a custom learning environment for them. Is an opportunity for you to create a custom learning environment for them? Or it's an invite for you to lead a local community faith-based educational experience? Paranoid Outlook says life is rigged in your favor. And why not? Because we all have a tendency to think that life is rigged against us, so why can't we supervise our mind to think that it's rigged in our favor? Let's say, after months of nurturing a vegetable garden, you wake up one morning to find that the rabbit has eaten all of your hard work. The pronoid perspective will dictate that this unexpected visitor is Allah's way of inviting you to explore deeper aspects of your gardening. Maybe you learn sustainable gardening practices. Maybe you create a wildlife-friendly garden. Maybe this experience introduces you to new, resilient plant varieties. Paranoid view will transform this encounter with the rabbit from a disaster to a success, because every success is built on a pile of failures.
Speaker 1:People that are successful don't resist paranoia as much. Let's say, during a routine checkup, your doctor tells you that you are vitamin D deficient. How is this the most beneficial, most merciful thing that can happen to you? How can this be a more perfect reason to get more sun, to start morning walks or take a new outdoor hobby up? Paranoia has the capacity to transform your health alert into a positive change. Now, before I give you any more examples, let me clarify a difference between pathological positive thinking and paranoia.
Speaker 1:Pathological positive thinking is a state of mania. This is grandiose positive thinking, and what makes these two different is your insight into the possibility that it could be one or the other Meaning. If you're aware that you can fall into mania, it will make it less likely that you're going to fall into mania. The difference between paranoia and mania is your active engagement of positive thinking to create the best outcome in a situation, because mania happens outside of your awareness and you don't control where your extreme positive thinking leads you and you don't have any control over when and how you will stop it. Pronoia also is not for every situation. It is healthy to respond with grief over someone's death. Mania does not let you make that distinction. Pronoia does.
Speaker 1:Pronoia involves a deliberate and mindful effort to adopt a positive outlook on situations. It's about choosing to see opportunities and blessings and actively engaging in thoughts that lead to best possible outcomes. You have control with your awareness. You consciously decide when and how to apply this mindset, adjusting it according to the context and situation. Mania is a pathological extreme of uncontrolled positive thinking, key word being uncontrolled, because during mania, individuals lose their ability to distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate times of positive thinking. This results in a failure to respond to genuine risks and dangers. Mania pushes you to deny or ignore a situationally appropriate grief altogether. It leads to harmful behaviors and eventual emotional breakdowns because it doesn't allow you to process the loss appropriately.
Speaker 1:If you have a financial setback on your hands, pronoia allows you to make it into a best possible outcome. You choose to ask yourself the highest level of questions how has Allah SWT made the situation a special blessing for me? Mania will create denial and overconfidence. Mania will cause you to downplay the severity of the situation and ignore the need of immediate corrective action. You could, in that case, continue to make risky investments, extravagant purchases, believing that everything will magically resolve itself. This is not what pronoia does, so apply pronoia in every scenario. If your mic stopped working at a fundraiser that you've meticulously planned for months, rather than seeing it as a technical glitch or as a disaster, consider it a spontaneous twist. This is the moment when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has made it possible for you to showcase your impromptu talents, connect with your audiences more intimately, project your voice, use your confidence, invite yourself to overthink the positive scenarios, or your dream job interview falls through. You've gone through a lengthy interview process.
Speaker 1:Extreme pro-noia will ask you to see beyond this setback. It will ask you to see beyond the universe, nudging you towards a greater opportunity. Paranoia will invite you to ask how is this the best thing that could ever happen to you? What leaps are you willing to take now that you weren't willing to take before? Paranoia creates extraordinary opportunities where just optimistic thinking might not cut it. I created this podcast during a five-hour flight delay that actually didn't even get reimbursed. How could this have been the best thing that ever happened to me? That's the question I asked and out came this podcast how is your flight or any other delay the best thing for you? Once you ask these pro-noid questions, allow your brain to answer them and you will create something that you didn't even think was possible. Let's say you accidentally delete your presentation right before the meeting.
Speaker 1:Pro-noia dictates this is the best possible situation, your chance to showcase your adaptability and your creativity. You speak from your acquired talent and skills instead of relying on the slide. You find this the best possible opportunity for you to let go of your perfectionistic tendencies that might have trapped you all of your life. Pronoia says now you have a chance to show off your confidence that you've been coached on. Chance to show off your confidence that you've been coached on. Apply pranoya in as many situations as possible. If your pet runs away or you get lost on a hiking trip, anxiety will come naturally.
Speaker 1:Pranoya has to be established with energy and creative thinking, with practice and redirection of the mind. It has to be done in the beginning to gather the inertia, the initial higher demand of the force that your life needs. Pronoia is the inertia that you need to change your life. It allows you to maintain control over your thoughts. You can choose to be optimistic in a way that enhances your life without losing touch with reality. But if you do have a tendency of losing touch with reality and but if you do have a tendency of losing touch with reality and slipping into mania, then please seek mental health counseling. This podcast is just an invite for you to create paranoia until you are in a mindset where you can maintain a wellness-based outlook in your life with less and less effort, because, like we established, initial change requires more energy. Maintenance of this higher ground, healthier mental state requires less energy. Choose extreme positive thinking where your brain is likely to slip into extreme negative thinking.
Speaker 1:Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, is continually providing opportunities and gifting us differently every day. Every annoyance, like losing your keys or waking up to a Tesla that's not charged or broken AC in the home Everything is the best possible outcome that can happen to you, asking questions like how is this secretly acting in my favor? How is this the perfect thing that can happen to me right now? How is this an opportunity for me to look at what I've been overlooking all of these years? How is this enhancing me? How is this a pure blessing? We magnify negative emotions because we don't actively manage our internal world. Now you get to work on exactly the opposite. Train yourself to expect positive outcomes and see the universe as a source of constant blessing and opportunities. And, inshallah, see changes happen in your physical fitness, deepening your relationships, career success, family dynamics, job satisfaction, financial success, on and on.
Speaker 1:Allow yourself happiness overload, because you never fall into paranoia. You fall into overwhelm. You have to move towards paranoia, you have to climb towards it. The gravitational force on a human being that pulls you down is the nafs. Easy to forget the mercy of Allah, but we work towards remembering the mercy that you enjoy. Mindset shift is from failures to feedback. It requires inertia of pronoia. An average person would ask how is the universe rigged in my favor? But a Muslim woman would ask how is Allah swt plan rigged in my favor? With that, I pray to Allah. O Allah, the most merciful, the most wise, grant me the strength to see your wisdom and mercy in every situation. Help me to embrace the belief that your plans are always in my favor. Fill my heart with awareness and paranoia so I may always look for good in all circumstances, trusting that you are guiding me towards what is best. O Allah, let your mercy. Transform my trials into wins of this world and the next Ameen. Ya Rabbul Aameen, please keep me in your draaz. I will talk to you guys next time.