Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Islamic Life Coach School Podcast
Universal Patterns of Change
In this episode I describe multiple powerful tools and techniques to create lasting change, from Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) to psychedelics and beyond. Learn how to regulate your nervous system. There are also body based modalities like deep breathing and grounding exercises.
Fear of making the wrong decision about which change work to choose? I also talk about how to make that decision.
Explore the benefits of coaching as an efficient tool for personal growth and find countless resources right at your fingertips. Embrace judgment-free reflection, adjust your plans without self-blame, and celebrate small successes on your journey to becoming the best version of yourself. Let's ask Allah SWT to bless us with the courage to embrace change with open hearts and transform our lives!
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Welcome to Islamic Life Coach School Podcast. Apply tools that you learn in this podcast and your life will be unrecognisably successful. Now your host, dr Kamal Uthar. Hello, hello, hello everyone. Peace and blessings be upon all of you.
Speaker 1:I figured today was a great day to talk about the basic framework through which all change workers create a difference in people's lives, meaning how therapists, hypnotists, coaches, psychiatrists and the like, with all of their trainings, create healing and improvement in their clients' lives. There are countless techniques out there to create change, some autodidactic You can learn on your own and implement on your own and see an improvement on your own. Other techniques needing mentorship and expertise, depending on the level of healing you're trying to create for yourself, and today in this podcast, i'm going to try to make sense of it all. By the end of the podcast, you should have an idea of which technique is the best for you and if change work is actually applicable to you. The ability to create change is always available to you. Every human being on this planet is created strong, empowered and capable of achieving greatness. This is the nature of the innate fitra.
Speaker 1:Now, how you define greatness is up to you. I said the word greatness and your nervous system might have gone to the socialist type of explanation, like the hyper capitalist society teaches you. You might have made it mean that I'm talking about wealth, and, yes, that is one possibility. But please feel free to define greatness however you like. You can pause this podcast if you'd like, but it's important that you have this definition to continue. How do you define greatness? Once you have an idea of what that might be, i'm telling you that you were born with all of the primary ingredients to achieve that greatness, meaning you were born with the right intellect, the right inclinations, predispositions, right challenges and strengths to create all the greatness that you ever want. This path to greatness and the insight into your own strengths gets availed through the effect of the world on us, and when that happens, we seek healing, we seek solutions and thus comes in all the treatment and change work modalities that are out there. Remember, the point of change lies within your nervous system, which connects you to the outside world. So let's embark on this journey together and discover how we can nurture and heal our nervous systems.
Speaker 1:The first step is to regulate or, in some cases, downregulate or upregulate your nervous system, and this can be done through various methods, such as deep breathing exercises, grounding techniques or even incorporating relaxation practices like yoga and meditation. Think of it all as preparing the soil before planting a seed of change. I'm going to attempt to go through most of the change work modalities that are out there, but by no means is this podcast comprehensive. The first one I want to mention is NLP, or Neurolinguistic Programming. It has within itself meta pattern techniques. These are powerful tools to help reprogram your mind and shift your perspective. It's like rewiring your brain for positivity and growth. Just imagine your mind as a beautiful garden and these techniques are the fertilizer that help you grow, nurturing thoughts, change at the nervous system level, as evident by the name Neurolinguistic Programming.
Speaker 1:Then there is psychedelics. This can be done with expert guidance only. Some studies suggest that psychedelics can provide profound spiritual and psychological insights and healing. The western pharmacological industry is quickly monetizing this modality and it will soon become available, but it is expected to be prohibitively costly. But I pray for the best, inshallah. This level of change through psychedelics has been available for centuries, but it is extremely important to approach this topic responsibly, because psychedelics can only be administered under trained professionals, people who are well versed in integrating these experiences into a holistic healing journey. Nowadays there are a lot of clinics opening up, like Ketamine clinics. They offer a similar service, where they induce a level of anesthesia on your nervous system through Ketamine, which is a drug that is actually used in anesthesia, and through that they create change in the ongoing lives of the patients. Patients coming out of these treatment modalities find profound healing.
Speaker 1:Then there is the polyvagal theory that we spoke about in detail already in the previous podcast. It's a fascinating concept that explores the connection between the nervous system and the body. Understanding the different states of our nervous system through this theory helps us create change at the level of the body. Again, extremely powerful work. This again can encompass the techniques of yoga, breath work, mindfulness. We call it mindfulness, but it's really bodyfulness. It's the practice of slowing down and enjoying every bite of every meal with its flavors, texture, fragrance. Slowing down to observe the nature with its colors, textures, movements, from large landscapes down to the details of a single leaf. This type of mindfulness provides a break to the nervous system at the body's level. So it's bodyfulness. This is an excellent gateway for beginners to start to regulate their emotions. This helps foster a sense of safety and connection Which, if you recall, is the highest state of the nervous system in the hierarchy of polyvagal theory, which is of social engagement, again doing work at the body's emotional level, but through the body's nervous system, while engaging thought work and language to steer the experience all along. It's all about unlocking the secret code to harmonious interaction. And then let's not forget about enneagrams and personality profiles. These tools allow us to delve deep into self-discovery, uncovering unique strengths, weaknesses and patterns of behavior. They bring a level of awareness that helps us recognize our own limiting patterns and our strengths, kind of like a treasure map guiding you towards your goals, empowering you to embrace your authentic, true self and your strengths.
Speaker 1:Then there are all the modalities within somatic therapy. As a huge proponent of somatic therapy myself, i believe in its strong power to heal and transform. I practice it myself and I teach it to my clients. I absolutely use the techniques in my day-to-day living. It's a big part of me. Importance of body awareness and treatment that is directed towards body healing and solving for trapped emotions creates a very impactful change.
Speaker 1:You are probably already engaging in a somatic healing modality, like getting a massage or using aromatherapy to relax, or a chiropractic adjustment. These are all somatic therapy modalities. You might not even realize Every time you wear your favorite sweatshirt, you're engaging in somatic therapy because it's giving you this sense of calmness and coziness and your nervous system calms down. You are using these calming signals from your body to calm down your nervous system. For me, it might be every time I get a hug from my husband or I get to have a belly laugh with my kids. All of that is deeply healing somatic therapy. This is one of the most accessible modalities of change available to you. Explore what helps you relax and engage in those activities to calm your nervous system. For the more complex emotions of past traumas and generational patterns, all of that might require more work and expert guidance. But your body, as a gateway to calm your nervous system, is always available to you. Maybe it's a warm bath, maybe it's exercise, maybe it's a nap, maybe it's an afternoon out with friends. Whatever calms your nervous system, use this modality to help yourself. You do not need anyone's permission to start creating this level of change. Keeping in mind, whatever level of somatic therapy you're using self-created or under expert guidance you are still targeting the nervous system through it.
Speaker 1:Then there is change and healing through faith systems. When we agreed to believe in the teachings of Islam. We program our nervous system with a predetermined code, as set forth by the teachings, as taught to us by the Quran in the Sunnah, and every time you're believing something, you have it deeply wired in your nervous system. A belief is a thought on repeat. Believing in the mercy of Allah SWT, believing in the messenger, prophet, peace be upon him all of these methods are deeply healing when used correctly. If you have a history of being wounded with the connection through faith, this modality might not be readily available to you, but it is always available for you to believe that anyone who abuses through spirituality has their own issues to contend with.
Speaker 1:Sharing this faith system is the deep part of my coaching modality. I rely on increasing our connection to Allah SWT, increasing connection to our higher brain, which I call increasing your soulful intelligence, or SQ. We do this level of change work through multiple features in my program, and they include zikr, mindfulness, creating and using khushru and suala as a healing modality, connection with the words of the Quran and creating healing through the Divine word. This doesn't just incorporate religion in your healing journey. It makes it a centerpiece, tapping into the divine source of tranquility and wisdom, which is your soulful intelligence. This is like finding a hidden treasure within ourselves, guiding us towards a path filled with serenity, purpose, growth, which eventually leads to success and thus to your definition of greatness. All roads lead to Rome.
Speaker 1:All modalities heal the nervous system. Some of them might be more fitting for you than others, but they are all available. So start somewhere. Because of this importance of the nervous system, i emphasize the C-near algorithm so much in my work, which stands for circumstances that are independent of N, which stands for our nervous system. E, which create our emotions. A emotions lead to actions or inactions, then R that lead to a result. When I'm referring to this in this podcast, what I teach in my coaching has to do with the subconscious and the conscious mind. It is very easily encompassed in the C-near formula. The language of our nervous system, which is the act of thought, is just a fraction of the picture, but through these thoughts we are able to create profound change. So always remember C-near, like you're looking at yourself from near and seeing something clearly for the first time.
Speaker 1:Children can be taught the same calming technique that are applied to their nervous system through body techniques If they have anger, anxiety or other issues. Their inside part of the brain is not yet fully developed, meaning they can't pinpoint the problem. They probably can't even use their language to explain it to you. They just know they don't want to feel bad anymore. These difficult feelings will be showing up in their undesired behaviors. Then, as practitioners, we can teach them self soothing techniques at the body's level. They've invented fidget spinners for this use. This is to keep the subconscious, add brain occupied, so their ears can then hear what is being said to them. Kids also have breathing techniques available for anxiety Also something called bilateral stimulation, where you activate both areas of your brain during an anger or anxiety episode by passing a small object from one hand to the other as the hands cross the midline of their body.
Speaker 1:The reason behind this is that fight and flight engagement causes tunnel vision, where you are either good to escape the situation or fight it with heightened emotions, while the situation might not be appropriate for either of these reactions. Then you can teach a child or yourself to employ these techniques at the body's level to activate both parts of your brain, therefore called bilateral stimulation. This way you can go from tunnel vision to a wider view. This gets you into a more resourceful state where you can start to see things more calmly. Oh my god, i can go forever, but I want to come back to the point When you are trying to make sense of everything that is out there, because you're looking for a way to help yourself, either through an expert, through a guide, through a coach or by yourself. Now you know what the main method behind the madness is, and you can just pick one modality of change and commit to it.
Speaker 1:No modality is wrong or right, they're just different. And also, don't be afraid to make a wrong decision, because a wrong decision is your opinion. There's no such thing as a wrong decision. It is only what you make. It mean, if you choose therapy and you find out that it's not for you or the therapist isn't a good fit for you, then it does not mean you make a wrong decision. It just means that you learned what is not for you. Fear of labeling your decisions as wrong in the future keeps you from making them at all, which keeps you stagnant. Worst case scenario you pick a modality of change and it didn't work for you. You'll be back where you are now. But imagine if a modality actually worked And imagine it created the change that you were hoping for. It gave you healing. It gave you grounding, the framework that you were looking for. Then imagine how different your life will be.
Speaker 1:We are always worried about what can go wrong with our commitment, and that is the courtesy of our lower brain. But what about giving equal weight to what can go right? What if what you choose is right? Stay in that possibility for a little bit and then make a decision.
Speaker 1:I am, of course, biased towards coaching. I'm not gonna lie, and this is evident by the name of this podcast. I believe coaching is an extremely efficient tool for creating change for functional individuals. There is a tremendous amount of change that can be created by focusing on thoughts. Whatever you choose for your inner improvement journey the science of this Kia going from lower brain default to a higher brain upgraded version that will be the right journey for you. We live in a time where you have countless resources at your fingertips. There was a time where people had to travel hundreds of miles just to learn from one mentor. I find so much gratitude when I think about all of the possibilities available to us. No matter what modality of change you go with, the common denominator will be the same, which will be your nervous system. Your thoughts, emotions, actions, spirituality all intertwine with your nervous system, shaping your experiences. Point of change lies within your nervous system. That is, your connection to the outside world, your way to recognize the divine and your way to make spiritual connection.
Speaker 1:Now that we've explored a wide range of change modalities available, it's time for you, incredible Muslim women, to make a choice. Remember, you always have a choice. Pick what you think aligns with your unique needs, whether it's talk, therapy or thought swapping, body awareness or a combination of multiple of these above approaches. The power to decide is in your hands, just like having to choose an outfit reflects your personality, style. You can choose a modality that speaks to your soul and empowers you on your journey. And once you start your chosen path, just start to monitor the results. Just take a step back and evaluate your progress, and this can only be done through compassionate observation.
Speaker 1:This term emphasizes the importance of reflecting on your experiences and choices without passing judgment on it. You don't have to have a judgment for your choice or for yourself just because you're evaluating something. An evaluation process will not be successful if there is judgment involved, so you have to create a safe and non-judgmental space where you can honestly assess your thoughts, behaviors and other success patterns. By practicing this judgment-free reflection, you create an environment of self-acceptance, self-compassion, allowing you to gain valuable insight and to make positive change without the burden of self-blame. This is a space of detachment, if you will, because you cannot create change if you keep blaming yourself, and self-blame is Shaitan's best trick. So what you have to do is observe how your plans are producing results, make adjustments if needed and celebrate small successes. Evaluate your progress in the change modality of your choice and refine your approach. Lather, rinse, repeat. This is how you will fully optimize your healing journey and optimize your greatness. You create a tremendous amount of healing just by focusing on thoughts alone, because every modality is trying to create change at the nervous system level, and your thoughts are the highest part of your nervous system, your conscious language.
Speaker 1:It might look like that you think you need something today, and it might look like you need something entirely different tomorrow. Just stay steadfast on this healing journey and continue with resilience. One of the main reasons Islam as a faith system was granted to us was so that we can achieve our wellness Mental, emotional and physical wellness. So just evaluate what it is that you need now. You might have needed therapy for years, but you might need coaching or you might need somatic awareness. With that, i pray to Allah SWT. O Allah, bless us with the ability to regulate and heal our nervous systems. Let us find tranquility and connection between our minds and bodies. Through connection with you, o Allah. Illuminate our paths towards self-discovery and growth, and grant us the courage to embrace change with open hearts. O Allah, we ask you to make this journey easy for us. Please keep me in your doors. I will talk to you guys next time.